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Tie The Knot

Hey y’all

So there are a few things I have come to realize as a 24yr old African female graduate and I will like to share with you. As an African female no matter where you find yourself, there’s a stigma of being married once you’re done with school and don’t get me wrong I personally think marriage is good but I also think if its not the right time and the right person don’t you dare get into it.

  • 1. Regret- Marriage isn’t meant to be a ’till you’re tired of each other’ thing. Marriage is a life time commitment. You don’t go into it because you think you can get out of it, when you can’t handle it anymore. So go into it without having regrets, go into it being sure of where you stand in the long run. If you’re going to regret it, then don’t do it. Save someone the stress of future unnecessary arguments, bitterness, anger and hurt.
  • 2. Pressure- You can be pressured into marriage, by society and even by yourself to attain everything by a certain age but take a step back and really look at the entirety of the situation. After the wedding everyone including your parents and your friends go home and you head home to your marriage. Can you handle it? Can you two support each other ? Can you say you can help each other, achieve each others dreams? If yes oh then by all means do it. But don’t ever feel pressured into something you are not ready for.
  • 3. Age – I don’t think theres a time frame to be married but I also think marrying young is  a good thing. Comes with both spiritual and physical benefits. So by all means if you’ve met the right person with the right conditions then hell yeah go for it and run with it. But don’t think you’re too young to marry or you’re getting too old so you need to just settle for marriage.

I am not against marriage at all but what I am against are  the misconceptions we have about females entering into marriage right after school. In a typical African setting, all you hear is ‘when are you getting married’ ? And its coming from a good place I believe but I also believe that there are dreams to be achieved and realized. Sometimes the one you love may not be the person to realize those dreams with. Then by all means don’t get into it. Yes it may hurt but it will be for that moment and well sometime after that. At that moment it could feel like the most terrible thing to ever happen but look into the future you want for yourself and the future they want for themselves.

Are your dreams similar? Do you have the same goals? Do you have the same principles? Do you want to live in the same country? Are you okay being married to someone from their background? Do you have the support system you need in them?

And note to self even when the truth hits you in the face it will be hard to accept it because obviously you want love to win but does it? Love is not enough for marriage to work! Its not I really wish it was. Then a lot of people will be married or will stay married. In the USA alone, about  50% of marriages have been predicted to end in divorce. I don’t think that was the goal when they got married. Most people wouldn’t have predicted their love for each other not holding them down.

You’ve been the one to answer all my prayers
Anytime I need You, I know that You’ll be there
‘Cause no one could ever love me like You could
I’m hoping that you’ll hear these prayers of mine
I’m hoping that we’ll be together for all times
‘Cause no one could ever love me like You could

https://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/cecewinans/noone.html

The above is from a Cece Winas song “Noone”.

From the lyrics I came to realization of how God is the only one who can meet all the criteria we search for in someone to love. So don’t be unrealistic. Just thought i would share my view. Hey, we are not obligated to have the same views after all. xox

Divorce Sats-  http://www.apa.org/topics/divorce/

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OPEN THOUGHTS

Hello everyone,

So I decided to stop writing for sometime. Things in my life were not working as well as i would have hoped for.  Funny thing about being “Grown Up” is thinking that everything is going to work, as smoothly as you would want, but that isn’t how life is,sadly.

No i cannot blog about the things everyone else blogs about not because i can’t per se but  i want to blog about things  i find passionate.  Yeah i like to make up and dress up but i don’t think i am good at blogging about that as i am about just putting down my thoughts ,that comes easier. I wouldn’t rule it out entirely, but just saying it’s not my main focus though that draws the crowd. Rather i would like to focus on self discovery and improvement.

So bear with me as i take you along my journey of self discovery and love and just overall health and peace of mind. It takes a lot to make everything work the way you would want them to, or to juggle it all. And sometimes we lose ourselves in the process and we tend to want to settle and just take what has been thrown at us.  I believe that settling can make you unhappy and it is something i would like to avoid. I don’t want to be sad about my life 10years from now because i made decisions today because i was afraid of the unknown and just settled.

I definitely do not know what the future holds but i know i want to be grow spiritually, mentally and emotionally. I am not talking about just any growth, I want a healthy growth. I want to make decisions because I am sure about them and I am willing to face the consequences. I do not want to make decisions because I want to please anyone per se or because I am being forced into it or because “I don’t want to be the one left out”.

I pray God gives me the strength to see it through and if you want to be part of this journey, you’re welcome to be part of the journey. You’re welcome to share your thoughts. xo

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Tears Dripping Down…

At times you wonder if you’re alone. Whether you carry it all on your shoulders, whether the ‘I love you’ you hear is really true.

You feel alone and under appreciated, you wonder if anyone sees it. You try your best but its never enough. God knows you would give your heart out on a platter just for the one you love but does he see it?

Tears drop down your cheek, your heart aches in pain. You wonder if it’s worth it. Your gentle heart taken for granted, your kindness for weakness. You see him jump hurdles for others but you’re given up on when you make a mistake.

Heart aches as he says he’s not sure about you but all you’ve known is how sure you’ve been about him. You stare, as your once mended heart shatters into a billion pieces only you and God can fix.

You see as he clothes his heart in a steel armour, protecting his and you leave your heart out in the cold. Bare.

You wonder why you’re able to bare it all considering the number of times you’ve been hurt. You wonder if maybe you’re the stupid one. The one who doesn’t allow others suffer for a crime they didn’t commit.

But you remember you’re different and its a cold world out there. Maybe, just maybe you must put on your own steel armour to protect your fragile heart……

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The Cross

To you it might just be a piece of wood. It might just be a reason why you get a holiday, to just chill. To you it probably means nothing. But the cross means much more to me. Let me tell you about the cross.

The cross represents love and sacrifice to me. It reminds me of the love i do not deserve. Someone giving himself up for me. This someone is Christ. I truly do not deserve this kind of love and I always say that if it were up to me, no one would be saved.

Let me set the scene for you: There was a prince who lived in the most powerful kingdom to ever exist. He had riches, servants at his  beck and call, he did not lack anything or have need for anything. One day he saw his father sad and down because his subjects were stubborn and disobedient and they kept straying from the rules he had made for them. These rules were made to guide them and to protect them. Now because of this, there was much suffering and pain and it brought tears to the king’s  eyes. So being a good son he asked his dad why he was sad and he told him everything. He really wanted to help at this point and was willing to do anything. His father then told him the only way to help these stubborn subjects was  to offer a sacrifice. The sacrifice had to be done with blood and the life of someone who would willingly  give up his or her life. (If it were me, this is when i would stop trying to help). The prince volunteered to be the sacrifice. Now mind you, the prince was an only child. He was the apple of his papa’s eye. ‘How’? the king thought aloud? Should i really allow my only son die in place of these disobedient subjects heading to destruction? But the love he had for his subjects was so strong that he permitted his son to offer up his life. Before the son could offer his life, he had to live like one of the subjects. He was sent away to live among the subjects. The people couldn’t recognize their prince. He tried to teach them the right way to live, he tried to draw their attention to the laws and rules of the land they were ignoring and to help them as much as he could, but they ignored him, mocked him, insulted him and rejected him even though he told them he was the prince. Only a few people accepted the prince and listened to him. Later on, one of the friends the prince made betrayed him and the prince got imprisoned. He was alleged to be a thief, fraudster and a whole lot. He wasn’t guilty of any of these allegations though. Now in prison, the prince was tortured immensely. All the guards disliked him and made his life terrible. He was scourged, a crown of thorns was made for him, he was not given any food or water.1-_ndiAgPyh8tdz3jV_z3pSw (The whip used and crown of thorns used look like this).

After the court hearing, the prince was found guilty and he was supposed to be killed by being hung on the cross. Even on the way to the place he was supposed to die for these people, he was still tortured, mocked and beaten. He had to carry his own cross and it was heavy. When they arrived at the place, he was nailed to the cross: a nail on both his right and left hands and a nail on his feet. Even as he was being tortured he still showed kindness to those who accepted him. So in the end he died for them. They were oblivious to the gift this prince had given them. But their lives had been spared.

Now, the prince is Jesus Christ and God is the king. The cross was Jesus carrying all our sins, hurts, burdens, weaknesses and so on, on himself so we might be freed. So to me easter is not about the easter bunny, no its about the cross and the man who carried all my failures and hurts so i can smile and have freedom. P.S if you have any burdens and you do not know what to do, offer it to Christ. He is willing to carry it for you. He loves you!

If you want to accept Him into your life, just say this prayer: Dear Lord Jesus, i thank you for coming to die for my sins. Please forgive me of my sins. I accept you as my Lord and personal savior. I turn my life over to you, come and be the master of my life. In Jesus name i pray with thanksgiving. Amen

Enjoy the holiday lovelies but don’t forget the reason. xo

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Women’s day

Hey guys,

I am excited about today’s post because it’s women’s day. I am guessing a lot of guys will think it’s overrated but I think it’s not because women deserve to be appreciated. Today’s post is going to be a little more for the ladies but guys you can read it too, to be enlightened.

Today I want all women to become women with direction. A woman with direction knows her purpose for being in this world. Women with  purpose are not known for  being aimless or known for not setting goals of their own. We usually give up at the first glance of failure but we have to learn from our mistakes,dust the past off and walk forward to bigger and better things. We definitely make mistakes it’s part of the journey we walk in life but the goal is to get past it And not let our past define us.

As a lady myself I have come to realize that there are things that befall us as women and I will talk about a few of them here. So actually I have a book I learnt a lot from and I won’t be stingy with it, ‘sharing is caring’.

IMG_4654

It’s a part of a rather bigger book titled ‘Daughter you can make it’, by the same author. Find it,read it, and you won’t regret it .

So one of the main things that keep us from greatness is fear. We get afraid of trying new things, fear of not being enough, fear of being with the wrong person, fear of giving everything and gaining nothing at the end of the day. What we fail to recognize is the fact that fear is not a good thing. Fear is actually a demon that keeps you away from greatness. The opposite of fear Is faith and that is what we should have. A woman of direction has faith in the future and hopes for the best in the unknown.

Another thing is emotions. Women are known to be emotional,yeah we are and it’s not a bad thing. It becomes bad when it clouds our judgement and makes us lose focus. We are driven by what we are passionate about and there is nothing wrong with that. We just have to be cautious about the thin line that makes it good or bad. We  tend to also be overly zealous and protective over our achievements and we don’t have to be that protective. It’s good to do well, it’s good to help other women come up too. Their achievements won’t diminish yours.

Woman! You’re beautiful! You’re the future! You’re the one who makes a house a home! Your eyes are full of love and understanding! Woman you have purpose! Woman you deserve all the best things in life! Remember “Queens know how to be great with other queens,isolating yourself will only diminish your greatness” . We are better together and stronger too.

To strong women, may we know them,may we become them and may we raise them!

Enjoy today and always to the fullest!xo

 

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Ghana

Happy Independence  day Ghana!! So for those of you who do not know, I am a  Ghanaian! Today marks the 60th independence of Ghana! On 6th March 1957, Ghana gained its independence from the British, making it one of the first west African countries to gain independence. The first president of Ghana Dr. Kwame Nkrumah and a group known as the big six(6) led Ghana to its independence.

So let me tell you about my country. Ghana is obviously on the African continent. West  Africa to be precise. The map of Ghana looks pregnant in my opinion(pregnant with diversity and awesomeness) and it has 1o regions. The capital of this great nation is Accra located in the Greater Accra Region.IMG_0585.PNG

The population of Ghana is about 27 million plus. The official language of the country is English, but there are other national languages like Twi, Ga, Fante, Ewe, Dagbani and so on. The currency of the country is the Ghana Cedi.  The current president of Ghana is Nana Akuffo-Addo.

The flag of Ghana has  red, gold and green horizontal stripes with a five-pointed black star in the centre of the gold stripe.The colour red represents the blood of those who died in the country’s struggle for independence; the gold stands for the mineral wealth of the country, while the green symbolizes the rich forest and agriculture of the country. The star represents the lodestar of African freedom and a symbol of African emancipation.

The economy of the country is from the gold,bauxite,diamond,aluminium and manganese. Other commodities are petroleum,natural gas, salt and silver. Agriculturally, Ghana is the largest second cocoa exporter in the world. Crops are the major agricultural produce of Ghana like cashews,corn,plantain. Unlike the fishery,forestry and livestock sector.

So now to the culture! The country has diverse culture with every ethnicity having its own unique touch to it.

Ashanti region is one of the main tribes of Ghana. The capital of this region is Kumasi.The Ashanti King is usually clothed in rich kente and gold for all the major occasions. The main food of the Ashantis is fufu with any soup(lightsoup,palmnut soup,groundnut soup, etc), The main language of the region is Twi.

400x225_340286Ashanti King

Greater Accra region, this is where the capital of Ghana is located. the capital of this region is Accra.The main language of this region is Ga. The favorite food of this tribe is kenkey with fried fish. The Independence Square is located in this region. The museum of the first president of Ghana is also located here.

thumbKenkey and fish.

Brong Ahafo region,this region is located south of Ghana with the capital being suyani.Major attractions of Brong-Ahafo include Kintampo waterfalls and nature reserves home of the Boabeng monkey sanctuary, a short distance outside Sunyani. Bono is the language spoken in this region.fuller-falls.jpgKintampo water falls.

Central Region,the capital of this region is cape coast. The dialect spoken here is Fante. This region is known for fishing and tourism. There are alot of castles and forts from the slave trade era in this region, examples are the Elmina castle and capecoast castle. Kakum National Park is also located in this region.elmina_castle-800x440Elmina Castle

Eastern reion of Ghana has Koforidua as its capital. Akan and English are mostly spoken in this region. The Akosombo dam(hydroelectric dam-main source of electricity in the country) of Ghana is found here. Aburi gardens a lush botanical garden is found in this region.akosombo.jpgAkosombo Dam

Northern Region is the largest region in Ghana. The capital of this region is Tamale. It has the Mole national park for tourism. The popular clothing of this region is the batakari and one of the favorite food is tubaani(boiled bean cake).

.images (1)

Western region of Ghana has two twin cities as the capital, Sekondi Takoradi. The main languages are Akan and English. It has a lot of rivers and lush green hills and fertile soil. It has the highest rainfall of the country. The main dish of this region is Akyeke. The region also has the Takoradi Port for both imports and exports.Nzulezo is a town in Takoradi that overlooks the Lake Tadane, and is entirely made up of stilts and platforms. In 2000, it was nominated as a UNESCO World Heritage Site, and it is a major tourist attraction area.Attiéké or AkyekeAkyeke

The Upper East regional capital is Bolgatanga, sometimes referred to as Bolga. Tourisim is very popular in this region:Parks- Gbelle game reserve,Sombo Bat Sanctuary,Jafiiri Sacred Royal Python Sanctuary,etc. Recreational area-Tongo rocks. Historic sites-Naa Gbewaa’s shrine,Navrongo’s mud-built church.102navrongo mud built church.

The Upper West regional capital and largest settlement is Wa. The Wechiau hippopotamus Sanctuary is located South West of Wa. A distinctive feature of the Upper West region’s culture is the brewing of pito (pronounced PEE-toe) a sweet, mildly alcoholic beverage derived from sorghum. Major economic activity is agriculture.627ff56cebe6d32d5c08405a42c6afcbpito.

Volta region, capital Ho. The main language is Ewe.Main dish of the region is Akple and Okro soup. For tourism, this region has Wli waterfalls,mountain afadjato and so on.063Mount Afadjato.

Okay so at this point i think i have written enough.Long live Ghana! Long live our rich culture and diversity! Happy 60th independence Ghana!